Oh Lord, here we go. Pot makes people kill other people. Got it. You see
how they randomly linked the two incidents together like they one
couldn't have happened without the other? What other things happened
that day that might be a more reasonable explanation for his behavior?
We'll probably not ever know, because as soon as law enforcement got the
sent of drugs - and pot at that (isn't it legal in CO???) - they just
used it as another excuse to "prove" their already debunked view on
drugs. Just when you think you just might see a silver lining and a
positive change in the critical mass, something like this happens and
you're reminded that you don't live in such a foreword thinking place
after all. It's rules and regulations over personal freedom are more
draconian than anything else. Makes me sad :(
"A Denver man accused of
shooting his wife
while she was on the phone with 911 dispatchers had eaten marijuana-infused candy before the incident, authorities say.
Detectives are investigating whether the candy had influenced his actions, the Associated Press reports.
Richard Kirk, 47, is being investigated as a suspect in the shooting
but charges have not been filed. Investigators reportedly found receipts
for “Karma Kandy Orange Ginger” and said he appeared under the
influence of drugs during an interview. They’re investigating whether
there were any other drugs in his system at the time of the shooting." READ MORE...
http://time.com/67999/police-denver-man-ate-pot-infused-candy-before-shooting-wife/
You might not agree with what I do. You might not understand my life choices. But if you can look past the my track marks, you might just find we're more alike than you think. This blog is about my life as a heroin addict, not about drug recovery.
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Sunday, April 20, 2014
Black Tar vs. White Powder: The Final Showdown!
There is a very big misconception among heroin users that white
powder heroin is purer that black tar heroin. This false information is
so fervently believed that most people, especially on the east coast,
take it for granted. But the truth is, the color of the heroin has
absolutely nothing to with the quality. Many people say that black tar
is dark because of the adulterants added when manufactured. Although the
manufacturing process is responsible for the color, it has nothing to
do with purity. Even if that was the case, it would make more sense
logically that black tar would be more pure, because it's almost
identical to pure opium.
Black tar is typically seen on the
West Coast and is sold in balloons or in grams. White powder is
predominantly on the east coast and often comes in stamp bags. Both have
their advantages and disadvantages. Black tar is much more difficult to
cut. However, due to the fact that it’s cooked with vinegar and other
harsh ingredients, it's much more damaging to your veins. However, it
burns at a much lower temperature, making it easy to smoke. Smoking,
when done efficiently, produces a similar rush as IV'ing, that can’t be
experienced with any other RoA. White heroin is very inefficient to
smoke do to its high burn temperature.
When a white
powder user does not wish to IV, insufflation is usually the RoA of
choice. The black tar and white powder heroin available today, and all
the variants in-between, are at an all-time high in terms of potency. I
have a home testing kit and it’s rare that I buy anything that’s below
70%. Of course, that’s through a dealer and not on the streets. Heroin
you buy on the streets is much more likely to be heavily cut. All that
being said – black tar heroin is much more consistent in it's quality.
White powder is much more variable. On top of that, is it frequently cut
with strychnine, which imitates the bitter taste of heroin. While black
tar can be more damaging to your veins, at least it doesn’t pose the
same life or death threat as heroin cut with strychnine
But let’s take a step back. An informed drug user is a safe drug user. What is the difference between white powder and black tar? One of the reasons that white powder is rumored to be more potent is because when it is first produced, it is very, very pure. But between Turkey, France, the UK, the US and then every wholesaler and independent dealer down the inventory gets cut every step of the way. As opposed to black tar, which only has to travel from Mexico or South America to California. It’s a much simpler process that help ensure it’s relatively untouched from manufacturer to consumer.
Strictly speaking, black tar is not entirely heroin. It’s a mixture of heroin, morphine, 6-AM, and other lesser ingredients. The
proportion
of these precursors in any given batch is variable. Thus, the potency
and quality can fluctuate by batch. Because of the high Morphine levels
in black tar heroin, IV users sometimes experiences a histamine reaction
after an injection.
White powder on the other hand is typically manufactured as heroin that is about 90% pure. But it rarely makes it past the first level of distribution before it is drastically cut. As it continues to make its way to the streets, it’s cut at every level. In the 1970’s this was a big problem. In the heroin capital of the world, Harlem, New York, it was only at best 30% pure. In the suburbs, it was only 5-10% pure. Today, we are graced with the highest purity heroin that the United States has ever seen. 60-80% heroin is very common – no matter what the type.
I’ve
lived on the east coast (born and raised a Jersey Girl) and I’ve spent a
significant percentage of my adult life in California. I’ve had plenty
of access to both white powder and black tar. Although I’ve had some
stellar white powder, I can’t say that I would prefer it over black tar.
Again, it’s much more variable in its purity. At least I know I’m
getting a fairly steady product with my current black tar connections.
As I mentioned, I do have a heroin purity test as well. Although I can
typically tell from a single shot whether the heroin has been
significantly cut, it’s always nice to test the results with a kit.
Bottom line, just because your heroin is white doesn’t mean it’s pure. I guess this naive thinking has something to do with notion that white equals pure. I’m not sure. But it’s simply not the case. If you want to find out for certain whether your heroin is pure or not, Amazon offers heroin purity kits, as do many other online retailers. Spend $20 and test for yourself. But please, don’t fall for these irrational, baseless wives tales about white heroin being “purer” that black tar. It’s just another junky myth.
 |
|
- The truth is, all heroin that is common in The States - white powder, black tar, brown powder, all of it - varies in purity and none is inherently more pure than the others. The color is dependent on the process used to manufacture the heroin. Most white powder comes from Turkey poppy fields and is often manufactured in France. Black Tar is typically from Mexico, although Columbia is quickly becoming a sizable producer. The Golden Triangle, which is an area of Indochina that overlaps three Southeast Asia countries, Myanmar, Laos and Thailand, and is known for its heavy heroin production, can produce white powder, black tar, brown powder and even red heroin.
 |
|
But let’s take a step back. An informed drug user is a safe drug user. What is the difference between white powder and black tar? One of the reasons that white powder is rumored to be more potent is because when it is first produced, it is very, very pure. But between Turkey, France, the UK, the US and then every wholesaler and independent dealer down the inventory gets cut every step of the way. As opposed to black tar, which only has to travel from Mexico or South America to California. It’s a much simpler process that help ensure it’s relatively untouched from manufacturer to consumer.
Strictly speaking, black tar is not entirely heroin. It’s a mixture of heroin, morphine, 6-AM, and other lesser ingredients. The
 |
|
White powder on the other hand is typically manufactured as heroin that is about 90% pure. But it rarely makes it past the first level of distribution before it is drastically cut. As it continues to make its way to the streets, it’s cut at every level. In the 1970’s this was a big problem. In the heroin capital of the world, Harlem, New York, it was only at best 30% pure. In the suburbs, it was only 5-10% pure. Today, we are graced with the highest purity heroin that the United States has ever seen. 60-80% heroin is very common – no matter what the type.
 |
|
Bottom line, just because your heroin is white doesn’t mean it’s pure. I guess this naive thinking has something to do with notion that white equals pure. I’m not sure. But it’s simply not the case. If you want to find out for certain whether your heroin is pure or not, Amazon offers heroin purity kits, as do many other online retailers. Spend $20 and test for yourself. But please, don’t fall for these irrational, baseless wives tales about white heroin being “purer” that black tar. It’s just another junky myth.
10 MORE Things That Suck About the Drug Culture!
As much as I like to think that drugs are the answer to all of life's
problems, if I'm being realistic about it, there are definitely a lot
of things that suck about the drug culture. As I'm sitting here pinning
over the fact that I'm not using meth, ("Oh poor me, I can only slam
heroin all day long and get stoned." Life sucks. Yeah, I know how lame
that sounds.) I figured I'd focus my energy elsewhere. So, ready or
not... the second incarnation of Things I Hate About the Drug Culture!
1. People who don't think that they're junkies just because they don't mainline, or even use heroin.
If you are addicted to opiates, you are a junky. Pure and simple. You don't need to IV to be a junky. You don't even have to use
heroin to be a junky. If you are addicted to Oxycotin, Methadone, Morphine, Vicodine or Codeine, you're a junky. But if you are addicted to Vicodine or Codeine, you should probably switch to something that doesn't have Tylenol. Otherwise, you will fuck up your kidney's permanently. Either that, or do what I do when I suddenly find myself with 25-75 Vicodine. Do a cold water extraction. The taste is bitter, but it's fairly simple and you remove all of the Tylenol. But don't kid yourself about being a junky. If your day revolves around how and when you are able to cop and use opiates of any sort, you are a junky.
2. People who go on Methadone maintenance but continue to use heroin, yet still tell you that they're quitting.
No you're not. Methadone intensifies the heroin high. If you are using both you aren't following the program. You are just getting more bang for your buck. So if you do find you are using less to start, it's just because you need less. But that tolerance will go up as well, and then you'll be addicted to two different opiates and a Methadone detox takes much longer. You are just hurting yourself, and you're not fooling anyone.
3. Actually... Methadone in general is a pet peeve of mine. Especially when people try to push Methadone on you when it's
easy
enough to go to a Suboxone doctor to get a script. Suboxone has so many
advantages over Methadone. Suboxone removes the ability to get high, or
at least makes it much more difficult. (I've certainly circumnavigated
the effects of Suboxone with enough heroin, but that option is not
financially feasible long term.) You can't OD on Subxone. It's much
easier to ween yourself off of and doesn't require medical supervision.
If you are serious about quitting, Suboxone is by far the best option.
And don't be nervous about going to the doctor just because you're a
junky. That's what the Suboxone doctor is there for. He had to go
through specialized training just to be able to prescribe Suboxone. He
is sympathetic to the needs of IV drug users, otherwise he wouldn't have
bothered to go through all that hassle. And with all the money you are
saving from cutting out your largest expense, you should definitely be
able to pull together some cash for a doctors visit.
One thought keeps leading to the next today...
4. Doctors who AREN'T sympathetic to the unique needs of IV drug users. You took the Hippocratic Oath. You made a promise to treat ALL patients and to act in their best interest. It's like some doctors just don't consider junkies people. One time, the hospital advertised for the treatment of abscesses and other drug related problems. But when I went in to have multiple abscesses looked at, I was given ample amounts of attitude and was told it was my own fault. Yeah, well... I know that. But I'm still here and I still need treatment.
(Side Note: After
that incident, we just started treating abscesses ourselves. It's easy
enough to do. Just keep draining it and sanitizing it. You can even buy
the appropriate antibiotics from an online pet store. The exact same
antibiotics they prescribe for abscesses are used for birds and fish.
You just need to calculate the correct dosage.)
Another time I went to the ER for something totally unrelated to my drug use. Once the doctor saw my track marks, he told me I had a stroke due to my drug use (by the way.... I was trying to quit at the time, so I hadn't used in a couple of weeks). He wouldn't touch me - it was like I was a leper or something. He barely spoke to me - just about me loudly to the other medical staff. He wouldn't even consider that it could be anything else. He almost demanded that I stay in the hospital to be monitored - even after the CAT scan results came back negative. I've rarely met anyone so thickheaded, stubborn and self righteous. By the way, after a second opinion, it turned out I just had some nerve damage in my shoulder. I have never felt so subjugated and menial. A doctor should never make you feel that way - no matter what life choices you make.
5. Cigarettes are still a drug, so I'm including this one.... People who want to ban the use or sale of e-cigarettes. This is so infuriating it makes my blood boil. E-cigs have helped countless people quit smoking. New York wanted to ban them because people might view smoking as social acceptable. Since when does the government have any right to dictate what is social acceptable? In Los Angeles, they are banned anywhere smoke is. So I'm not allowed to walk my dog in the large outdoor park next to my apartment (Pershing Square, DTLA). That's completely insane. No one is allergic to them. No one can smell them. They aren't bad for your breathing. They cause zero pollution. It's WATER VAPOR people! I should be able to smoke an e-cig in a airplane if I want. (I'm not. I tried the last time I flew. You can do it in the bathroom though. No one will ever know because they don't actually smoke!) People have called them started cigarettes. Total Bullshit. No kid is going to think that e-cigs are "cooler" to start than regular cigarettes. But even if that was the case, the government cracked down on flavored tobacco because it was more appealing to kids. So if you must, do the same thing with e-cigs. Ban all the disgusting fruity flavors. But don't try to make them out to be worse than regular cigarettes! Alright, nuf said about that. But... if "they" win and e-cigs are banned, I'm suing someone.
6. People who can't handle their acid. Unfortunately, I find this happens much more with women than with men. I took some acid on
a plane ride once with my boyfriend. When we were partying later that
night - with one of these girls - she gave us an unusually hard time
about taking the acid on the plane. She kept rambling on and on about
how terrible it would be, blah, blah, blah. I felt like I had to defend
my actions. It brought the whole trip down. Why shouldn't I do that?
Just because you flip out and become crazy on LSD? Let me trip how and
where I want. That same girl, along with another one of her friends,
also tried to suck me into this conversation about how you just "need a
good cry" on LSD. What? No I don't. Why would I want to do that? Leave
me alone, don't pull me into your bad trip. I love LSD. All the time. In
any situation.
7. People who only do psychedelics for the "spiritual experience". I had been trying to get my best friend to take mushrooms with me forever. Turns out her psycho boyfriend kept feeding her all these lines about how they should only be used to experience a higher plain of existence. Finally I talked her into to taking some at a show with me. She loved it and it wasn't a spiritual experience at all. Sure, I like to use psychedelics in that manner too sometimes. But more often than not, I use them for fun. It does't need to be this whole big religious ceremony to "properly" experience them. They are recreational drugs, after all. This is something you see A LOT of in the DMT community. Many people on DMT Nexus will be happy to preach to you about the only "right" way too use DMT. It's all horse manure. Use psychedelics any way you want. Personally, I think a balance between recreation and spiritual mind expansion gives you the best of both worlds.
8. People on the streets who pressure you to buy from their guy. They will either try to 1.) collect a fee. Or, 2.) ask for a cut of your stash. Leave me alone. Stop following me. I'm not giving you anything. Chances are, if I'm out scoring on the streets, I don't have a dollar more than what I'm trying to spend on drugs. Yes, I know I stick out like a sore thumb trolling the streets of Skid Row. It's like the lyrics from that Lou Reed song "I'm Waiting For My Man" - "Everybody's pinned you and nobody cares". Everyone knows what I'm doing down there. The same thing that everyone else is doing. But just because I'm white and female, people think they can make a dollar off of me, or get a free fix. Junk is not cheap on the streets. One balloon will barely get you well. There is no way I'm going to split my balloon with you. Scram. Leave me alone. I'll find it myself.
9. Old addicts who want to impart their wisdom on you. I have come across this countless times. Last week at the needle exchange some old guy was yapping about how I shouldn't use 29 gauge needles. I told him I have small veins, so a small needle does less damage in the long run. He went on and on about how if I would just go for a run everyday I wouldn't have that problem. Or that I should shower before I use, yadda, yadda, yadda. First, going for a run is not going to magically make my veins bigger. My problem isn't circulation.... actually I don't have a problem. I just have veins that are different than yours, so I do things a little differently. I don't need your old junky wisdom. Once, a lady actually tried to pull a needle out of my hand while I was attempting a shot, because she knew that she could hit it better. That's absolutely not cool. Besides the glaring fact that I know nothing about your hygiene or what diseases you might have... I know my veins inside and out, what works and what doesn't. If you think you see something that will work better, chances are I've tried it and it doesn't. I'm not some doe eyed innocent who happened to find herself on the floor of a bathroom in a homeless shelter on skid row with a needle sticking out of her arm. I promise, you won't find a vein any easier that I will.
10. People who use NA as a substitute for their addiction.
You see them in every meeting. They are usually the first ones to talk,
the loudest ones in the room, and the ones who refuse the believe that
anything but this program can work for anyone. Sure one addiction might
be better for your health and have a lower risk of death then the other
one. But don't fool yourself into thinking you are more evolved than the
addicts who still struggle with drugs. NA is not the solution for
everyone. Just because it worked for you, doesn't make it scripture.
Nobody's addiction
is the same. We use for different reasons. We quit for different
reasons. Our rock-bottoms are all different. No cookie-cutter program
will work for everyone. I don't want to substitute taking drugs with
talking about not taking drugs. I know NA has helped a great number of
people. I personally am thankful for it. But if you are just
substituting one life-consuming addiction for another, are you really in
recovery? Shouldn't the goal be to life that's not centered around
drugs?
Along those same line- I'll just make this little addition about NA. People who use NA to wield power over others and take advantage of their authority over new comers. I knew this one guy who used to lie all the time in NA . I heard him tell the same stories time and time again, but with different endings, depending on the point he was trying to make. He was trying to use real-life examples of what would happen if you didn't follow the program as it was designed. He was misleading a very vulnerable group of people. Some people use NA as a substitute for what is now missing in their lives. And some people need to feel powerful. If they are powerless over their drug use, they will find power somewhere else. Let me tell you something Mr. Big Shot. Having power over people who are trying to get clean for the first time is not impressive. They are probably the most vulnerable, least confident, easy to manipulate group of people there is. Why don't you volunteer at an ICU for infants? Would that make you feel powerful? They're just about as easy to control as the newly clean trying to pickup the shattered pieces of their broken lives. They want to believe anything you tell them if it comes with the promise of a better life. Don't use your leadership position to control others. That's an addiction in itself. And the worst part was that so many of the "lessons" he was trying to teach were complete hogwash. Like, if you drink non-alcoholic beer, within the night you'll be slamming dope.
Again, a disclaimer: I have found NA to be very helpful and I don't belittle all the wonderful things that it was done for people in recovery. But like any organization that is run by humans, it's not perfect. But the world is certainly a better place because of it's existence.
Pft. I could keep going, but I think I'll end my little rant here. I actually do feel much better.
1. People who don't think that they're junkies just because they don't mainline, or even use heroin.
 |
|
heroin to be a junky. If you are addicted to Oxycotin, Methadone, Morphine, Vicodine or Codeine, you're a junky. But if you are addicted to Vicodine or Codeine, you should probably switch to something that doesn't have Tylenol. Otherwise, you will fuck up your kidney's permanently. Either that, or do what I do when I suddenly find myself with 25-75 Vicodine. Do a cold water extraction. The taste is bitter, but it's fairly simple and you remove all of the Tylenol. But don't kid yourself about being a junky. If your day revolves around how and when you are able to cop and use opiates of any sort, you are a junky.
2. People who go on Methadone maintenance but continue to use heroin, yet still tell you that they're quitting.
No you're not. Methadone intensifies the heroin high. If you are using both you aren't following the program. You are just getting more bang for your buck. So if you do find you are using less to start, it's just because you need less. But that tolerance will go up as well, and then you'll be addicted to two different opiates and a Methadone detox takes much longer. You are just hurting yourself, and you're not fooling anyone.
3. Actually... Methadone in general is a pet peeve of mine. Especially when people try to push Methadone on you when it's
easy
enough to go to a Suboxone doctor to get a script. Suboxone has so many
advantages over Methadone. Suboxone removes the ability to get high, or
at least makes it much more difficult. (I've certainly circumnavigated
the effects of Suboxone with enough heroin, but that option is not
financially feasible long term.) You can't OD on Subxone. It's much
easier to ween yourself off of and doesn't require medical supervision.
If you are serious about quitting, Suboxone is by far the best option.
And don't be nervous about going to the doctor just because you're a
junky. That's what the Suboxone doctor is there for. He had to go
through specialized training just to be able to prescribe Suboxone. He
is sympathetic to the needs of IV drug users, otherwise he wouldn't have
bothered to go through all that hassle. And with all the money you are
saving from cutting out your largest expense, you should definitely be
able to pull together some cash for a doctors visit.One thought keeps leading to the next today...
4. Doctors who AREN'T sympathetic to the unique needs of IV drug users. You took the Hippocratic Oath. You made a promise to treat ALL patients and to act in their best interest. It's like some doctors just don't consider junkies people. One time, the hospital advertised for the treatment of abscesses and other drug related problems. But when I went in to have multiple abscesses looked at, I was given ample amounts of attitude and was told it was my own fault. Yeah, well... I know that. But I'm still here and I still need treatment.
(Side Note: After
that incident, we just started treating abscesses ourselves. It's easy
enough to do. Just keep draining it and sanitizing it. You can even buy
the appropriate antibiotics from an online pet store. The exact same
antibiotics they prescribe for abscesses are used for birds and fish.
You just need to calculate the correct dosage.)Another time I went to the ER for something totally unrelated to my drug use. Once the doctor saw my track marks, he told me I had a stroke due to my drug use (by the way.... I was trying to quit at the time, so I hadn't used in a couple of weeks). He wouldn't touch me - it was like I was a leper or something. He barely spoke to me - just about me loudly to the other medical staff. He wouldn't even consider that it could be anything else. He almost demanded that I stay in the hospital to be monitored - even after the CAT scan results came back negative. I've rarely met anyone so thickheaded, stubborn and self righteous. By the way, after a second opinion, it turned out I just had some nerve damage in my shoulder. I have never felt so subjugated and menial. A doctor should never make you feel that way - no matter what life choices you make.
5. Cigarettes are still a drug, so I'm including this one.... People who want to ban the use or sale of e-cigarettes. This is so infuriating it makes my blood boil. E-cigs have helped countless people quit smoking. New York wanted to ban them because people might view smoking as social acceptable. Since when does the government have any right to dictate what is social acceptable? In Los Angeles, they are banned anywhere smoke is. So I'm not allowed to walk my dog in the large outdoor park next to my apartment (Pershing Square, DTLA). That's completely insane. No one is allergic to them. No one can smell them. They aren't bad for your breathing. They cause zero pollution. It's WATER VAPOR people! I should be able to smoke an e-cig in a airplane if I want. (I'm not. I tried the last time I flew. You can do it in the bathroom though. No one will ever know because they don't actually smoke!) People have called them started cigarettes. Total Bullshit. No kid is going to think that e-cigs are "cooler" to start than regular cigarettes. But even if that was the case, the government cracked down on flavored tobacco because it was more appealing to kids. So if you must, do the same thing with e-cigs. Ban all the disgusting fruity flavors. But don't try to make them out to be worse than regular cigarettes! Alright, nuf said about that. But... if "they" win and e-cigs are banned, I'm suing someone.
6. People who can't handle their acid. Unfortunately, I find this happens much more with women than with men. I took some acid on
a plane ride once with my boyfriend. When we were partying later that
night - with one of these girls - she gave us an unusually hard time
about taking the acid on the plane. She kept rambling on and on about
how terrible it would be, blah, blah, blah. I felt like I had to defend
my actions. It brought the whole trip down. Why shouldn't I do that?
Just because you flip out and become crazy on LSD? Let me trip how and
where I want. That same girl, along with another one of her friends,
also tried to suck me into this conversation about how you just "need a
good cry" on LSD. What? No I don't. Why would I want to do that? Leave
me alone, don't pull me into your bad trip. I love LSD. All the time. In
any situation.
7. People who only do psychedelics for the "spiritual experience". I had been trying to get my best friend to take mushrooms with me forever. Turns out her psycho boyfriend kept feeding her all these lines about how they should only be used to experience a higher plain of existence. Finally I talked her into to taking some at a show with me. She loved it and it wasn't a spiritual experience at all. Sure, I like to use psychedelics in that manner too sometimes. But more often than not, I use them for fun. It does't need to be this whole big religious ceremony to "properly" experience them. They are recreational drugs, after all. This is something you see A LOT of in the DMT community. Many people on DMT Nexus will be happy to preach to you about the only "right" way too use DMT. It's all horse manure. Use psychedelics any way you want. Personally, I think a balance between recreation and spiritual mind expansion gives you the best of both worlds.
8. People on the streets who pressure you to buy from their guy. They will either try to 1.) collect a fee. Or, 2.) ask for a cut of your stash. Leave me alone. Stop following me. I'm not giving you anything. Chances are, if I'm out scoring on the streets, I don't have a dollar more than what I'm trying to spend on drugs. Yes, I know I stick out like a sore thumb trolling the streets of Skid Row. It's like the lyrics from that Lou Reed song "I'm Waiting For My Man" - "Everybody's pinned you and nobody cares". Everyone knows what I'm doing down there. The same thing that everyone else is doing. But just because I'm white and female, people think they can make a dollar off of me, or get a free fix. Junk is not cheap on the streets. One balloon will barely get you well. There is no way I'm going to split my balloon with you. Scram. Leave me alone. I'll find it myself.
9. Old addicts who want to impart their wisdom on you. I have come across this countless times. Last week at the needle exchange some old guy was yapping about how I shouldn't use 29 gauge needles. I told him I have small veins, so a small needle does less damage in the long run. He went on and on about how if I would just go for a run everyday I wouldn't have that problem. Or that I should shower before I use, yadda, yadda, yadda. First, going for a run is not going to magically make my veins bigger. My problem isn't circulation.... actually I don't have a problem. I just have veins that are different than yours, so I do things a little differently. I don't need your old junky wisdom. Once, a lady actually tried to pull a needle out of my hand while I was attempting a shot, because she knew that she could hit it better. That's absolutely not cool. Besides the glaring fact that I know nothing about your hygiene or what diseases you might have... I know my veins inside and out, what works and what doesn't. If you think you see something that will work better, chances are I've tried it and it doesn't. I'm not some doe eyed innocent who happened to find herself on the floor of a bathroom in a homeless shelter on skid row with a needle sticking out of her arm. I promise, you won't find a vein any easier that I will.
10. People who use NA as a substitute for their addiction.
You see them in every meeting. They are usually the first ones to talk,
the loudest ones in the room, and the ones who refuse the believe that
anything but this program can work for anyone. Sure one addiction might
be better for your health and have a lower risk of death then the other
one. But don't fool yourself into thinking you are more evolved than the
addicts who still struggle with drugs. NA is not the solution for
everyone. Just because it worked for you, doesn't make it scripture.
Nobody's addiction
is the same. We use for different reasons. We quit for different
reasons. Our rock-bottoms are all different. No cookie-cutter program
will work for everyone. I don't want to substitute taking drugs with
talking about not taking drugs. I know NA has helped a great number of
people. I personally am thankful for it. But if you are just
substituting one life-consuming addiction for another, are you really in
recovery? Shouldn't the goal be to life that's not centered around
drugs?Along those same line- I'll just make this little addition about NA. People who use NA to wield power over others and take advantage of their authority over new comers. I knew this one guy who used to lie all the time in NA . I heard him tell the same stories time and time again, but with different endings, depending on the point he was trying to make. He was trying to use real-life examples of what would happen if you didn't follow the program as it was designed. He was misleading a very vulnerable group of people. Some people use NA as a substitute for what is now missing in their lives. And some people need to feel powerful. If they are powerless over their drug use, they will find power somewhere else. Let me tell you something Mr. Big Shot. Having power over people who are trying to get clean for the first time is not impressive. They are probably the most vulnerable, least confident, easy to manipulate group of people there is. Why don't you volunteer at an ICU for infants? Would that make you feel powerful? They're just about as easy to control as the newly clean trying to pickup the shattered pieces of their broken lives. They want to believe anything you tell them if it comes with the promise of a better life. Don't use your leadership position to control others. That's an addiction in itself. And the worst part was that so many of the "lessons" he was trying to teach were complete hogwash. Like, if you drink non-alcoholic beer, within the night you'll be slamming dope.
Again, a disclaimer: I have found NA to be very helpful and I don't belittle all the wonderful things that it was done for people in recovery. But like any organization that is run by humans, it's not perfect. But the world is certainly a better place because of it's existence.
Pft. I could keep going, but I think I'll end my little rant here. I actually do feel much better.
Free Narcon for Everyone!
With all of this talk about Narcon being made available, I wanted
to shed light on another wonderful service that the Needle Exchange in
DTLA offers. Homeless Heathcare Los Angeles - Center for Harm Reduction -
or as must junkies in the area know it The Needle Exchange, offers a
variety of potentially life saving programs and classes. One of the is a
Overdose prevention class, usually offered Wednesday mornings. If you
sit through the 1 hours class on how to prevent over doses and what to
do when they happen to limit the chances of the police showing up, then
they give each attendee two free prescriptions of Narcon. Can any junkie
afford not to utilize this service? And they have been doing this for
years. Obviously this only helps a very small percentage of IV drug
users out there since in only in Los Angeles. But most people don't know
that this service exists here. I would suggestion finding out where
your closest needle exchange is and find out what services they offer.
HHLA also offers IV drug users free acupuncture, one-on-one therapy
sessions, Methadone and Suboxone programs, Free HIV and Hep C testing,
doctor services for abscesses and other IV drug related problems,
support classes, jewelry making, yoga, art classes and so so so much
more, even housing services. Pick up a monthly calendar when you go in
to stay up to date on their monthly activities. Take advantage of these
services, they are only available to IV drug users. You don't have to
feel embarrassed, no on is going to try to change you. They are just
there to support an under represented class of society. And the free
Narcon could definitely save your life.
☮ ❤ & ♪♬
D_D
☮ ❤ & ♪♬
D_D
So with all of my struggle with drugs, I forgot to mention a huge
accomplishment! I have official quit cigarettes! I had made the decision
that when I turned 35, if I still wasn't having significant improve
with quitting then I would consider Chantix. Enough is enough.
Cigarettes don't theoretically kill people. They are responsible for a
significant percentage of deaths each year. It's just a matter of time.
And at 35, my risk was significantly higher. I've been smoking (on and
off) since I was 17, I've been of the birth control pill since I was 17
and I've been a IV drug user this whole time as well. I was a walking
statistic for a blood clot. I had bought a couple of of those
rechargeable e-cigs to try to use as a substitute, Blue e-cig was one of
them. But they did help much. The nicotine in one filter was 15 grams. A
a filter lasted 2 or 3 charges. Compared to a cigarette with 12 grams,
that wasn't much at all. I was tried the patch and Nicorette. But I
figured out that if I used the patch and smoked the e-cig, while chewing
nicotine gum, I still wouldn't get as much nicotine as I would from
smoking one cigarette. Although it did help me cut down from a pack a
day, to about a half pack. Unless I was stressed, then I was
significantly more. But then I decided to go the vaporizer route. I
bought one for my boyfriend for Christmas, and got a really nice on a
two-for-one deal. It came a few days before Christmas and I figured I'd
break it open try mine. I got the 24 mg liquid for it. The first day I
was able to cut down from 10-15 cigs a day, to 3. Overnight. I couldn't
believe the difference it made. I was so mad that I hadn't tried these
ones first. Now, I've officially quit. Some people might poo-poo this as
just another crutch. But for me, the goal was never stop being addicted
to nicotine, it was to stop smoking cigarettes. If I smoke the e-cig
for my rest of my life, that's fine with me. It's not going to kill me.
Even still, I've already been able to cut down from 24 mg liquid to 18
mg liquid.
I know, I know, I've already gotten shit about this from other people. "Great that you quit cigarettes, but is that really what you should have been worried about? How about that whole addicted to heroin thing?" But it's better that I limit my health risks in anyway that I can. I can justify it a thousand ways till Tuesday, but it doesn't matter. These are my life chooses right now. Maybe I get to the place where I want to quit heroin, maybe I won't. Either way, it's still much better for my health and I feel great. My cough is basically gone, it's amazing how long that stuck around though. I'm not out of breath. I'm so happy. I wasn't sure if I was ever going to be able to quit. It just makes me so upset that people are trying to ban them. They are such a benefit for people trying to quit. The stupid people who are trying to say they are "starter cigarettes" instead of "quitter cigarettes" are completely backwards. They shouldn't be sold to kids the same way cigarettes shouldn't so sold to kids. But for those of us who have tried to quit for over a decade and then suddenly are able to quit overnight with the right e-cig, they've been a Godsend!
I want to buy the guy who invented them a beer.
Peace, Love & Rock 'n Roll!
D_D
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I know, I know, I've already gotten shit about this from other people. "Great that you quit cigarettes, but is that really what you should have been worried about? How about that whole addicted to heroin thing?" But it's better that I limit my health risks in anyway that I can. I can justify it a thousand ways till Tuesday, but it doesn't matter. These are my life chooses right now. Maybe I get to the place where I want to quit heroin, maybe I won't. Either way, it's still much better for my health and I feel great. My cough is basically gone, it's amazing how long that stuck around though. I'm not out of breath. I'm so happy. I wasn't sure if I was ever going to be able to quit. It just makes me so upset that people are trying to ban them. They are such a benefit for people trying to quit. The stupid people who are trying to say they are "starter cigarettes" instead of "quitter cigarettes" are completely backwards. They shouldn't be sold to kids the same way cigarettes shouldn't so sold to kids. But for those of us who have tried to quit for over a decade and then suddenly are able to quit overnight with the right e-cig, they've been a Godsend!
I want to buy the guy who invented them a beer.
Peace, Love & Rock 'n Roll!
D_D
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Heroin Humor
It depresses me that whenever heroin is in the media, or blogged
about it's always such a downer. Let's face it, there are definitely
come comical things about drug culture and heroin use. So, in order to
bring more levity to the topic... I've put together a list of the top
ten heroin jokes! I know, lots of people will say this is in bad taste,
but those people probably shouldn't be reading my blog anyway, unless
they are just looking to fuel their fire.
So, without further ado..
Top Ten Heroin One-Liners!
1. Junkies can find a needle in a haystack
2. You know your 11 year old nephew has a competitive streak when you give him heroin and he doesn't flinch when the needle goes in.
3. I think the surest way to get over a fear of needles is to try heroin.
4. Just watched "True Life: I'm Addicted To Heroin" and now I'm high on heroin.Just kidding,I didn't watch"True Life: I'm Addicted To Heroin".
5. Always get back on the horse unless the horse is slang for heroin.
6. the Cow was bummed because he had just scored some heroin.
7. Someone told me shooting heroin up your rectum is addictive. I think putting anything up your rectum is addictive.
8. I am so relaxed since i quit drinking. I think the heroin may be helping.
9. My friend has parkinson's disease and is addicted to heroin. He can't seem to shake the habit.
10. Why is heroin better than a man (or woman): Heroin doesn't care about your looks, as long as you have good veins.
Know any more good heroin jokes? Feel free to post them in the comments section :)
Meth Joke Bonus Content!
Q: What's the difference between a crackhead and a tweaker?
A: The crackhead will steal your shit and bounce, the tweaker will steal your shit and then help you look for it.
And if you just can't get enough heroin humor... I thought I'd share my playlist of funniest heroin related clips on YouTube.
Heroin Humor Playlist
I'm always looking for new ones, so let me know if you have a Heroin Humor clip that not included in this playlist :)
Peace, Love & Rock 'n Roll!
D_D
So, without further ado..
Top Ten Heroin One-Liners!
1. Junkies can find a needle in a haystack
2. You know your 11 year old nephew has a competitive streak when you give him heroin and he doesn't flinch when the needle goes in.
3. I think the surest way to get over a fear of needles is to try heroin.
4. Just watched "True Life: I'm Addicted To Heroin" and now I'm high on heroin.Just kidding,I didn't watch"True Life: I'm Addicted To Heroin".
5. Always get back on the horse unless the horse is slang for heroin.
6. the Cow was bummed because he had just scored some heroin.
7. Someone told me shooting heroin up your rectum is addictive. I think putting anything up your rectum is addictive.
8. I am so relaxed since i quit drinking. I think the heroin may be helping.
9. My friend has parkinson's disease and is addicted to heroin. He can't seem to shake the habit.
10. Why is heroin better than a man (or woman): Heroin doesn't care about your looks, as long as you have good veins.
Know any more good heroin jokes? Feel free to post them in the comments section :)
Meth Joke Bonus Content!
Q: What's the difference between a crackhead and a tweaker?
A: The crackhead will steal your shit and bounce, the tweaker will steal your shit and then help you look for it.
And if you just can't get enough heroin humor... I thought I'd share my playlist of funniest heroin related clips on YouTube.
Heroin Humor Playlist
I'm always looking for new ones, so let me know if you have a Heroin Humor clip that not included in this playlist :)
Peace, Love & Rock 'n Roll!
D_D
Please People - Practice Harm Reduction
I just read The Heroin User's Handbook, and he points out something
that I know to be true because I've seen it so many times in my life.
Even when syringes are readily available and free for the taking, many
IV drug users still reuse old needles - even when they've been made
aware of the free service! Worse yet, many people still choose to share
needles! Even in this day and age, when AIDS and Hep C still run rampant
in drug using societies, people intentionally share needles when free
ones are readily available and within walking distance. I met a girl in
the skid row area a while back and she asked if she could have my old
needle. I told her their was a needle exchange not even four blocks
away. She had no idea it was even there! And then when she did know, she
still had no interest in using it. Opting instead to buy a rig from a
dealer for $1. Where do you think he got all those needles? The FREE
needle exchange down the street! Needle Exchanges offer such a valuable
service to IV drug users. I just wish that everybody would take
advantage of what they have to offer. Not only does it prevent
life-threatening diseases, but it helps to keep your veins in top
shooting shape. Even if you don't share needles but just reuse your old
needles, it's still very damaging and dangerous. Besides tearing your
veins up, bacteria can form, causing abscesses and being responsible for
its own variety of diseases. We currently have about 800 needles in the
house. Yeah, obviously I worked up to that. But you know? The needle
exchange offers anyone 10 rigs plus all the equipment you need to prep
your shot - even if you don't bring anything in to exchange. So if you
don't want to spend the $3.19 at Wallgreens for a 10-pack, go pick up 10
free needles. Then bring them into exchange when you are done with
them, preferably on a Wednesday when they offer a 2-for-1 deal, and pick
up 20 new ones. Keep doing that and soon enough you'll have a sizable
stash of your own that will last you for a couple weeks or more and you
never have to use the same needle twice! The book also contains a large
section on how to prep a shot. The emphasis was on cleanliness and
hygiene. It surprised me a little, especially when he talked so much
about keeping your needle clean, that he didn't mention using a suck-up
needle. I always suck up the liquid in one needle and then transfer the
contents by back-filling a fresh needle. That way there are zero
sanitation concerns, but more importantly, it doesn't damage the tip of
the needle at all. I've posted this picture before, but I just want to
refresh everyone's memory, because it is so important to use a fresh
needles every single time. This is a comparison of the tip of a syringe
before it's first use and the subsequent uses after that, up to six
times. 
Does that look like something that you want to put in your veins?? Hell
no! Even if I'm having trouble finding a good vein, if I've made too
many attempts I switch needles. It will help keep your veins usable for
longer. And I think that's important to every IV drug user (unless you
just slam occasionally. In which case... good for you! I envy your
ability to use in moderation!) So that's all. I'm done my little
soap-box rant. But I do care about the health of my IV drug using peers.
And I want the community to be as safe as possible. Firstly, for your
own personal heath. Secondly, to reduce the number of IV drug related
health problems. So that society will have one less reason to stereotype
us all as lazy, irresponsible, good for nothing junkies who pose a
heath threat and a danger to society. Harm reduction is important. I
hope everybody who decides to "play" with the IV ROA takes this
seriously. At best, it will safe your life. At worst, it will save you a
couple of abscesses.
☮ ❤ & ♪♬
D_D
Does that look like something that you want to put in your veins?? Hell
no! Even if I'm having trouble finding a good vein, if I've made too
many attempts I switch needles. It will help keep your veins usable for
longer. And I think that's important to every IV drug user (unless you
just slam occasionally. In which case... good for you! I envy your
ability to use in moderation!) So that's all. I'm done my little
soap-box rant. But I do care about the health of my IV drug using peers.
And I want the community to be as safe as possible. Firstly, for your
own personal heath. Secondly, to reduce the number of IV drug related
health problems. So that society will have one less reason to stereotype
us all as lazy, irresponsible, good for nothing junkies who pose a
heath threat and a danger to society. Harm reduction is important. I
hope everybody who decides to "play" with the IV ROA takes this
seriously. At best, it will safe your life. At worst, it will save you a
couple of abscesses.☮ ❤ & ♪♬
D_D
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